Alexplorer Goes Time Traveling...

If you're just joining this series already in progress, then it means you don't have a time machine, so here's the short version: Every Tuesday (your present), I come back from my adventures time-traveling around MySpace and fill you in on what happened to people from my past as they keep slippin', slippin', slippin' into the future.

Ah, here's one now...



Molly

Then:
Molly (not her real name) lived in my dorm across the hall from me.  I didn't really see all that much of her though.  She wasn't the hair-flipping ditzy type, but she was in a sorority.  I don't remember much about her other than that.  I mean, she was pretty bland.

Now:
She's so bland now that you'll need Tabasco to read her profile*.  It's that boring.  This is a masterpiece of literature in the way "American Gothic" is at visually capturing puritanical America.

About me...I am happily married to my college sweetheart, [name withheld], and am the mother of two wonderful boys who are six and four in age. I never could have imagined how happy all three of my "boys" would make me!.....On a professional note, I am a certified teacher who had the wonderful opportunity to switch gears and become a "stay at home" mom. I have now returned to work this school year. I started off as a third grade teacher but am moving into a kindergarten position once we return from Christmas holidays. On a personal note, I am a member of [withheld] Baptist Church in New Orleans. I have found great satisfaction in having a personal relationship with Christ and am so thankful to two key people for leading me that way. An old friend, [withheld], and my husband have been key factors in showing me the way. Thank you!! I have served in a few different capacities at [the church]. I began as a nursery volunteer, then became a Bible study teacher for two year olds, then moved on to volunteer in our children's church program. I am currently helping out with our Children's Choir and Mission Friends programs. The most profound and fulfilling order of service was serving as Director for our church's Vacation Bible School. Just knowing that I had a direct impact on the planting of seeds for approximately 180 children was overwhelming!! I also volunteer for my college sorority. In the past I have served as Chapter Adviser for [her sorority] chapter at [our college]. I have also served as an Area Recruitment Coordinator for the national organization. I am currently serving as the National Membership Recruitment Coordinator. My being involved with collegiate women has been a true learning experience that has been wonderful!

*That was Beth's description upon hearing about poor, sad, brainwashed Molly, someone who has no identity of her own without a homogeneous group to glom onto.


Hypothetical letter I'll probably never send to her:
Dear Molly,

My condolences on your death.  I know you don't realize it, but whatever you're doing, it ain't livin'.

-Alex.


Copyright 2007 Ale[x]plorer.  All photos are of the actual individuals described above because, seriously, I can't make this shit up.
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