>What stickers do you have on your car, if any?
An LSU sticker from almost 10 years ago. I can't remove it since apparently it's holding the car together.
>Do you have an air freshener in your car?
I have windows.
>What posters do you have in your room?
Don't have any. I made Star Wars dioramas though. Top that!
>Do you have plants in your room?
Fungus isn't a plant, is it?
>Name of an actor or actress in the last porno you watched?
I think this guy's was "Daddy" because that's what she kept calling him when he put her over his knee.
>What do you hear right now?:
The guitar humming to the monitor. Apparently they want to mate with one another.
>If you could drink anything right this second, what would it be?
>Last piece of mail opened:
Netflix: Ali G dvd. Booyakasha. Respeck!
>What's your job position called?
Corruptor of youth.
>What size ring do you wear?
I don't wear rings, but I'll take the money if that's what you were planning to get me for xmas.
>Does anything hurt on your body right now?
I'm biting a guitar pick into my lower lip, but not too hard. Now the girl in the porno on the other hand...
>What city was your last taxicab ride in?
Dallas. We were exploring underground and were too tired to walk back above ground let alone to reinflate the raft and go back the way we came (even though it was downstream).
>If someone you hated died, would you laugh and spit on their grave?
Sure, if the cops hadn't pinned the murder on me.
>Do you own a picture phone?
I don't even own a cell phone.
>What's your birthday?
Some multiple of 365.25 days since I was born.
>What was your elementary school's mascot?
Jesus. It wasn't very inspiring.
>What's your favorite bottled water?
The pond scum we studied in high school biology.
>What's the next concert/show you're going to and when?:
Pink Floyd. Yeah, like that will ever happen again.
>What were you doing at 9 pm last night?
Why? Did something bad happen to someone I threatened?
>What's your favorite Starbucks drink?
Sodium cyanide. Because that's what I'd have to be drinking to go in one of those places.
>Do you exercise as much as you should?
What? My rights? No.
>Did you attend your High School prom?
Yes. I'm not sure why exactly.
>Did you go to someone else's prom?:
Yes. The next year with my then-girlfriend (different than the year before).
>Did you do the deed on prom night?
Nope. Neither time, in fact. Both nights were very memorable for their lameness.
>Would you give your bf/gf a second chance if they cheated on you?
Depends. Most likely I would save my "get out of cheat free" card for later.
>Something purple within 5 feet of you:
It's apparently on the other side of something else. I can't find anything purple in my line of sight.
>The sexiest item of clothing you own:
My Emperor Palpatine costume for Halloween.
>If the Matrix existed, would you want to know?
I'm already there. I was first in line for the cranial implant.
>How long can you hold your breath underwater?
I don't know. I shower.
>Your nails were last painted:
They were? Whose were first painted?
>Favorite Pocky flavor:
Chocolate? Honestly, I'm looking for stranger things on my Asian grocery store adventures.
>The weirdest thing you've ever heated in the microwave:
Probably something from an Asian grocery store.
>How much Japanese do you know?
All except for the parts they blur out.
>Ever done the Electric Slide?
If it involves a cattle prod and KY jelly, then no.
>Do you look good in yellow?
No. I don't wear anything that isn't grey, green, or blue. Unless it's Halloween, of course.
>Ever danced naked in front of a crowd?
Of one? Well...
>Is your hair long enough to chew on?
>Least favorite color?
Red. I have too many red guitars. Some would say too many guitars.
>Ever had Dippin' Dots?
No. I like chewy sweet tarts.
>Ever played an instrument?
Guitar, guitar, guitar, classical guitar, gypsy guitar, bass, fretless bass, ukelele, banjo, keyboard, violin (badly), and sax (very, very badly). I can also tune a radio, but I very rarely play it.
>Ever had a H2O massage?
No. Unless this is a euphemism for something else, in which case NO!
>Do you believe in Big Foot?
Chewbacca lives a few miles from me. Does that count? I saw Kenny Baker and his wife the weekend before last as well.
>Ever been to a palm reader:
Dani has one, but I couldn't get used to writing with the stylus so I bought an Alphasmart instead.
>Last Pez dispenser you purchased?
Star Wars? My ex had a lot of these, so maybe one I bought for her.
>Have you had sex in your current car?
Yes, but not in a long time. Say, do you need a ride?
Sushi. But that's always the case.
>Last dessert you had:
It's been a while. You just gave me an idea.
>Have you ever had a black eye?
Not since kindergarten when I fell and broke my nose. When I got the nose fixed 12 years later they were a little bruised looking, but I don't know that I could count that.
Show up about an hour before I have a migraine.
>Ever crash a car, been in accidents?:
Yes. You ever see "Unbreakable"? I'm Bruce Willis.
>Ever sang in front of a crowd?:
At a talent show at the school where I used to teach, I sang/played "We Don't Need No Education."
>Favorite kind of pizza?:
>How many tickets do you have?:
I got a warning the night before last for "totally pausing" at a stop sign.
>How old were you when you had your first REAL boyfriend/girlfriend?:
Probably 17. The one before her was more like a lab partner in a very small human sexuality course without a teacher.
>Do you want to get married?
That's the most unromantic proposal I've ever read. And it sounds exactly like how I asked my ex.
>How is today going for you?
I'm glad it's mostly over. That's the nicest I can say about it.
>Ever photograph something that was dead?
Yes. Aside from Asian groceries (including some very, very nasty canned squid!) I've also seen plenty of carcasses underground including loads of dead turtles.
>Do you find Smurfette sexy?
She's blonde and ditzy, so no. Now Bugs Bunny dressed as a woman? Oh, yeah.
No hang gliding last weekend.
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