Who Moved My Cheese(burger)?

True story, sadly.

Burger King.  I love Burger King.  It's the one fast food restaurant I actually like and will actively look for.  This is in spite of the fact that I worked there in high school, believe it or not.  Since my new house had no food in it until I moved some over, I decided I would go to Burger King.  I mean, I hadn't had breakfast because, while the cereal was at the new place, the milk was still in the fridge at the old place.

Thankfully, the nice thing about having a GPS (even an older, cheaper model like mine) is that you can ask it where the nearest restaurants are.  This is especially useful when you just moved to a new part of town like right now.

So I say, Hey, GPS, where's Burger King?  It says there's one a couple miles away.  I say, great!  Thanks, GPS, I'm glad I brought you with me!  I drive over there and find out it's the Burger King at the zoo.  Thanks a fucking lot, GPS.  You really got me that time.  I'm not buying a ticket into the zoo to go to Burger King.  Okay, so is there really a Burger King around here?

I should have known it was teasing me again because it sent me back the way I came from.  I end up maybe a mile further from my house than where it sent me before, and I find the new wing of the hospital standing on the spot where the Burger King was up until a little over a year ago (in other words, shortly after I bought this copy of the GPS's database).  Good thing there's a hospital there though because my blood pressure is in heart attack/stroke territory.

I say, okay, fuck you, GPS.  This isn't funny anymore.  I'm hungry and I've asked you twice already.  Now tell me: Where's a fucking Burger King?  It sends me several more miles out to an area where I don't ever remember seeing a Burger King.  Sure enough, it's a Wendy's.  Thanks a fucking lot.  Fortunately, these units are apparently at least as rugged as Samsonite luggage because I threw the fucking thing on the floor of the car and stomped on it.

Copyright 2006 Ale[x]trovert.
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