I just saw this on David Letterman:
Top Ten Reasons Why Tina Won't Hang Out With Alex...And the Number One Reason Why Tina Won't Hang Out With Alex:
10. Hates nice guys.
9. Is embarrassed about copious gas brought on by sudden, radical vegetarianism.
8. Doesn't want to push Randi over the edge and maybe end up on 'Cops' again.
6. Persistent rumors about Alex's penis size may in fact be true.
5. Afraid of getting roped into being the flower girl at the wedding.
4. Currently out of Paxil and is too agoraphobic to leave her apartment to pick up the refill.
3. *[Unavailable because Tina was asleep on the couch (again) and could not be reached for comment.]
2. Advised by her shrink to keep her fantasy life separate from real life.
1. Doesn't like the fact that friends might start referring to the two of them as "T'n'A."-Alex.
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