Still More Grammar Annoyances

Yes, more of these.  You keep talking and writing, and I'll find more get get annoyed with how you're saying it.

Gotta kinda, sorta mumble.  Look, contractions are a part of everyday speech and accepted even up to most instances of formal language.  However, if you're typing like this, you're probably not very interesting to listen to.  I want to hear each syllable, not just soma them.

You don't have dyxlexia.  Someone said it that way as a joke and you're so stupid you go around saying it like that's what it's called.  You belong in special ed.

That's nuts.  So-called shelled peanuts don't have shells.  WTF?

'Til vs. till.  Who talked everyone into requiring an additional l in the abbreviated form of until?  We already have a till in the English language, and it has enough meanings already (e.g., cash drawer, farming).  It's simply a contraction, so 'til someone comes up with a good reason why we need to confuse matters, I'll spell it as such.

It's A trap!  No one pronounces the a in villain.  So what villin put it there?

The opposite of a homonym: Primer.  It's the same word, but if you're talking about paint, somehow it gets the long i sound.  If you're talking about an introductory text or lesson on a subject, now it gets a soft i... and a second m, seemingly.  Since the meanings (though related) have diverged, why not do the same with their spellings?  See my primmer on the subject.

Ad vs. add.  You add friends on MySpace who you met with your personal ad.  Why can't you keep this straight?  I can, and I have ADD!

?Why is the punctuation at the end of the sentence?  Many interrogatives begin with words that announce themselves as such (e.g., who, what, when, where, how, and why), but could you tell right from the start that this one would end with a question mark?  Since the modality of the statement determines the inflection, it is important to know that at the start in a public reading session!  (<-Caught you again.)

A façade of importance.  That's what the word façade carries.  No other word incorporated into the English language compels folks to look for the cedilla on their character map.

Signing off to yourself.  "Sincerely, Alex" makes sense (not just because I always am; I'm referring to the comma here).  However, ending a message with two thoughts separated by a comma splice?  That's fucking bullshit.  Anything along the lines of "Thanks, Alex." is like thanking yourself as a sign-off.  If that's what you're doing, please make it a suicide note.

Copyright 2008 Alexplorer.
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