|James cut up some pants legs and invented an Adam Sandler routine. It really is that easy!|
|I think his name was Craig. He was
like some sort of Sean Penn character who similarly stayed out of the spotlight.
I don't know if I was the one who took this picture, but I'm guessing not solely on account of the fact that I don't recall being hit by him.
|Cathleen didn't notice the camera I snuck
out during her turn in this game of Truth or Dare. I know guys who
didn't get half as lucky in college as this pencil did that night.
Players included Cathleen, Robin, and June. On the guy's team there was me, the giant stuffed dinosaur, Joey, and some guy whose name I forgot but I have lots of stories about how weird he was. My ex met him a few times and always referred to him as "Scares me."
|These guys (there were four of them; I couldn't tell them apart, honestly) were actually involved in a pyramid scheme. How can anyone who made it past first grade math not see through one of these?|
|I also "dated" June (from the Truth or Dare game) for about five minutes sometime during my sophomore year (Note the clock). She never used her tongue when she kissed, so I felt like a pedophile. True story.|
|Tad was a funny guy, but he spent most
of his time hiding in his room.
I have several Fantasy Island jokes in mind for the rest of this caption, but I just don't think they can compete with the visuals here.
|May (on the left) had no personality whatsoever.
In all likelihood this means she's a successful professional somewhere
On the other hand, Sally was itching to break out of her Baptist conditioning. Joey and I used to act like complete nuts around her for the joy of seeing her simultaneously laughing uncontrollably while embarrassed to the point of blushing to be seen with us.
This was probably good practice for her though seeing as how compartmentalization is a standard survival strategy of anyone who can't wrest themselves from the stranglehold of their religious upbringing.
|Ron throwing something at me (or whoever was taking the picture). Being a math and physics major, he, of course, missed by a mile.|
|Me and the ex. If I was bitter, I would post a picture of her huge ass. By merely mentioning it without the visual, I have established that I'm only bitter enough to talk shit without doing anything about it.|
|The sun was probably out when this photo was taken. I know this because Joey is sleeping. See, we were only awake in the middle of the night onward until the end of our morning classes, then crawled back to our room and crashed. We had cable. The glowing box was a novelty to us.|
|James shows off concert tickets to a show by some country guy I had never heard of while Janice shows off the ravages of the freshman fifteen compounded with the sophomore twenty and probably about half of the junior thirty.|
|Sally and some guy who lived in the dorm. He seemed nice enough, but can you really trust a guy in college with a mustache? I mean, that's just wrong at that age. We never talked to him.|
|Melinda was skinny therefore I wanted to bang her. However, she was not my type in so many other ways such as the fact that she played head games with her then-boyfriend to the point that he threw his keys at her one night. Sure, throwing your keys at a girl (or even a rational human being) is never justified, but if you knew this otherwise nice, level-headed guy, you'd know just how much shit he took from her to get to that point.|
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